Jesper has been avoiding Kaz and Inej since the influence dropped from him, although especially Kaz. Inej lives with him so he sees her off and on, but he usually leaves early in the morning and comes back late, although he is always carrying his box of goods and money at the end of the day. He's not going to gamble, he's trying to make up for what he lost. All his focus is on making and selling things, and avoiding the attention of the people he loves most who he can't look in the eye. He is weighted down with sadness and guilt, but day by day he is getting better.
So it should be a big warning sign when he shows up at Kaz's door knocking sharply, something big enough to concern him more than his own bad feelings. Jesper doesn't look sick but he looks anxious, pale and jittery, nothing supernatural about it but plain old panic. Usually Jesper is the most fearless of the bunch, throwing himself into trouble with a laugh and reckless shrug. There are only a few things that truly scare him, and one of them just got severely slammed on. The fear of the army knowing his Grisha abilities, like at home.
"It's possible there is a problem," he says to Kaz when the door opens instead of a greeting. Jesper bites his lip, making eye contact and then glancing away, his feelings a bit of a mess at the moment. Trust him to keep bringing problems to the man he loves instead of solving them.
The problem is, they're both avoiding one another. Jesper because of letting Kaz down, and Kaz because... he's avoiding all people after the rot and the bodies and all that had come with it. He's spending too much time in the Horizon that is "safe" and he's plotting and gathering things and a furtive dark shadow with extra layers on, a hard line to his limp from pushing himself too hard, and a paleness to his already pale look that is as haunted as he feels.
Kaz opens the door at the rap cautiously, still dressed in all but his overcoat and even with his gloves still on. Blinking as he steps back to let Jesper in, wondering if he's finally broken the silence that they've both kept. He doesn't expect an apology, nor does he have anything to apologize for, and yet they're both waiting on it. There's so much more, the flirting, the push that he could hurt Kaz and it's only left him wanting to prove he can't be hurt, this place can't hurt him and it can't use Inej and Jesper to do it. He's taken a million steps forwards in a short time.
And now he's gone back beyond the starting line of when he'd arrived. At least its how it feels to him.
Those words though are something else entirely.
"Sit down," he says softly, that part of him that had come so far wanting to be there for him, to comfort him when it's obvious he's in a panic. Yet he fears his reaction if he tries, fears he'll make Jesper feel he's disgusted with him and so he does what he knows he can. To help in the ways he still can. "And then tell me everything."
No argument. No question. Just there for him. Even as he stays by the door, watching Jesper as if he can't look away.
Jesper's guilt is all-consuming, both in terms of being a failure with the gambling, and a failure in being someone he can count on too. Just once he would've liked to not be the fuck up, or to be able to be comforting, to take on a different role than the one Kaz always has to handle. It took him back a few steps too, in a way. No longer confident and comforting about their new relationship.
He brushes past him and sits on the bed, putting his elbows on his knees and his chin on top of his hands. Jesper is all long limbs and while wearing bright colors like red usually is a display of his personality, right then it seemed like the vividness of the color of his jacket was washing him out instead.
"On the supply run, we came across a ravine, we had a limited amount of time to get over it in order to make it into Solvunn. There was a creature of some kind below, so it was important we got across."
Jesper didn't go into exact detail about the supply run, brushing it off as a success and that he used his corecloth and new metal armor for the first time. He did mention that his metal armor, which he turned into a dozen blades immediately, sliced through some animal attack and he thought he was very impressive. Ciri even thought he was impressive! Because Jesper likes to show off. Kaz knows how impressive he is in a fight, so there's no reason to try and show off for him, but he is naturally that way. He can always be more badass in the eyes of everyone else. But this part he didn't mention since it'd seemed handled.
"Claude distracted the guards so that Ciri and I could use our abilities. She can teleport, not sure why she wants it secret, but she does." And now Kaz will have to keep that secret. Teleporting seems like a fairly harmless ability but who is he to assume what is or isn't scary for other people? "We got down some trees and I used my abilities to create a bridge of bark. It was bloody hard, I passed out afterward. The guards didn't see any of it happen."
Because of Claude. Jesper should be showing off just as much about this, it was a huge display of his Grisha abilities, and difficult and complex, turning the trees into a bridge, molding them with the rock of the ground. Strong enough for people and horses and a caravan full of things to get through. It was necessary, but now Jesper sees how dangerous it was. Except what was he supposed to do? It was the only option. They had to succeed, Free Cities needed those supplies after the attack.
"Claude told me he was taken in for questioning by guards, and they asked him about how we got over the ravine. He lied successfully, but he thinks they're going to ask the rest of us."
Kaz does his best to not back up from Jesper, trying to hide how unsettled he still is. It's hard to hide from those that know him though so he's sadly kind of glad that perhaps Jesper is distracted enough to not notice how bad Kaz is doing.
Yet it's rolling off of him in waves, radiating nervousness and uncertainty. Things he's always done well to keep underwraps but unaware he can't hide like he used to. Not after what he's been through recently.
He's quiet though, standing and watching Jesper intently to take in not just his words but what lies beneath them. The fear of being found out to carry his own magic here, what that could mean, and what comes next. He can imagine how all of that is weighing on Jesper's mind.
And despite his own issues, his uncertainty with where they stand, his own emotions well up. Jesper is his, and he'll be damned if someone here tries to take him away.
For one he takes from it that Jesper is much more advanced than he'd like to admit. A Grisha with those abilities would be a welcome addition to the Second Army, and he suspects the Army here as well.
"Did he tell you the lies he told them? Enough so you could give your own version of how you managed it based on his story?" He's quiet a moment, considering this as he not knowing enough about all of this to know what they would do from here, but he knows why Jesper fears.
"Are they conscripting Grisha here as they do for the Second Army?"
He has another fear as well. That would use him against the magicians in other lands, someone that strong would be valuable, but so far they had asked and not forced. Yet.
When Kaz returns to his room one evening, he finds a very familiar scene laid before him: Inej perched in the window, both knees tucked to her chest and her arms looped around the back of her knees. She's missed it, making reports to him was a promised time with him, so when her shift at Portam Hall was over, she came here. She's been here a while, but it doesn't bother her. She's used to being first.
She doesn't say a word or make a noise when the soft noises of something being unlocked makes her eyes jump toward the door. A smile spreads over her lips even before he has a chance to notice or greet her. She doesn't even have to actively hear him say the words anymore, she knows they're coming and it makes something in her giddy. Stupid boy.
(She loves him).
Edited (a typo that would forever haunt me on rereads later lmfao) 2023-01-04 23:28 (UTC)
Coming to his room to find Inej there in the window waiting is a comfort he hasn't speak about having missed. Especially since those moments had changed before coming to this place. It had been their time, something he could look forward to even as he made the long trek up the stairs at the end of the day.
Now as he opens the door, he's acutely aware of a sensation that is both familiar and pleasantly jarring at the same time.
He knows that many thought him as mystical as his Spider, both seeming to possess gifts that are far beyond the scope of the average person. It never occurred to them that it came from danger and threats and the need to always be one step ahead of everyone else if they wanted to survive.
Standing there, barely across the threshold, he's aware of a change of light in the room where her form changes the shadows. He knows the scent of her, the very energy she possesses. A singular step to the side, the tap of his cane as he moves and then the door clicks shut, followed by the solid sound of the lock engaged.
Any who say him might not think his expression warm but Inej may know differently at the slightest twitch of his lips, and the definite emotion in those words.
That smile never leaves her face, only widens and somehow becomes even more reminiscent of sunlight than ever. His presence really does fill the room, and his words fill her up and wrap around her. It's something in the air she can feel shift as soon as he's there.
It's comforting. She missed this.
"Swindle any crooks for fun today?" she lets that smile turn more sly into a smirk.
Seeing her in the subtle light of the room is like gazing upon the sun. Especially because of that smile which is so brilliant he hasn't a thought in the world for a moment. Then he can't help but nearly smile as he steps closer and drops a few items on a table.
A golden bangle. A small fold of money in a clip. A singular cufflink.
"I regret not getting the pair," he laments as if he's truly bothered. "Not how I would like to be handling business but it pays for what we need."
It might be resorting back to his roots but that's why he had forever kept nimble in such things.
Jesper ends up not being afraid that Kaz will pass out after all. He can catch him if so, but there is a difference between being light-headed from trauma and light-headed from desire. Kaz is about to learn that very well, considering whose arms he's in and the promises he's made. The kiss remains sweet although there is applied pressure, but he doesn't part his lips and taste him. Jesper knows it is best to dance that line.
He turns his head when Kaz's skin touches his cheek, breathless, to brush his lips against the fingertips and the palm of the glove. Jesper looks at him with eyes that are pure silver when in this setting, and he smiles, leaning in. This time not to kiss him but to speak right against his ear. He leans Kaz back against the wall again and slides his arm from around him.
"Have you ever touched yourself, Kaz?" His voice is pure deep honey near his ear, his breath blowing on it but he isn't kissing it. He is the one being good about skin touch, making certain that every time they connect with skin it is Kaz's choice. It's not as if Jesper needs to touch his ear for his words to be felt. Jesper puts a hand on his heart and slowly presses it down.
Down, down, down.
Kaz can stop it at any point if he wants to, it is clear that Jesper is testing their boundaries, but he did tell Kaz he had an idea. If allowed, he places his hand on top of Kaz's pants, exactly where he would put his mouth if he could. He doesn't apply pressure yet but his hand is scorching hot, it would be so simply.
"I can get you off just like this, Kaz. You'd never have to touch skin." He did tell him he could make it so good. Jesper pauses though, he doesn't touch him more than that. "We could have a good time over our clothes. We could touch ourselves and watch the other while we do. I could tell you what I want to do to you as you touch yourself. There are many ways of being sexual, and I want to help you explore that, when you're ready."
The world is positively spinning and there's nothing in Kaz that wants to make it stop. He feels alive in that moment, empowered. Just as he had with the kiss shared with Inej. He hasn't pushed himself, but the ache has been there since that brief moment before he passed out the first time. He's wanted this, wanted to show them how much he's willing to give for all the years they've given him everything. Jesper had called Kaz on it, and he knew it was true. They had given him everything, and he knew it.
And now it was time for him to give them everything he could.
That touch of lips against his finger tips makes him shiver, lips parted and his cheeks red as he stares at Jesper with such dark eyes that they're practically pools of onyx.
That question causes an instant reaction, one that is nearly painful in that moment between shock at the kiss and words that challenged him to make an admission. One that was more complicated than he wanted to get into in this moment.
And easy enough not to answer as Jesper's skilled hand skims down along his body and he feels as if he's positively thrumming. There's no move to stop the other man, not even able to stop himself from leaning into Jesper's touch with a soft sound that is equally pained and desperate in turns.
The truth is that Kaz has held vague thoughts of things like this, of things he could do with those he cares about despite all his fears and panic but he'd always dismissed this. So certain it would be dismissed, that it wouldn't be enough for them, and now Jesper is offering him so much.
And this is his chance to say no, to explain he can't handle it, doesn't want this, and all would be a lie.
Instead though he draws back slightly, only enough to look Jesper in the eyes as he drags his fingers along the other man's cheek. Then his fingertips brush against Jesper's throat, pressing to the pulse of his throat for a moment.
Trembling as he leans in, kissing him once more as his lips part and his tongue brushes lightly against the breadth of Jesper's bottom lip.
This probably isn't the best place for them to do this, but it's not as if Jesper is capable of stopping when he isn't told to. They are caught in this lustful moment and the fact that they are technically in public is something that actually does it for him. They are tucked away into a corner, someone would have to come looking deliberately to find them, and so he is going to keep going. If they take too long to think about this, there are too many reasons to stop.
His own blood is boiling from the intimacy of the moment, from seeing Kaz surrender to him and what he's doing. Jesper wasn't entirely certain if this would be too much but Kaz is demanding (begging?) for more. He lets out a sharp breath when Kaz's tongue touches his lip and he almost loses control of himself. Almost kisses him within an inch of his life, plundering his mouth with his tongue, he wants it so much, but it seems like a risk, going too intense.
Because of that he reins himself in to return the kiss, pressing close, and he parts his lips so that Kaz can choose to explore if he wants it. Jesper is still dedicating himself to letting Kaz pick any skin contact while he is taking advantage of the clothes. Jesper's hands drop to Kaz's pants and he undoes them just a little to make it easier for him to only have one layer of clothes between them. It would be very easy to hurriedly do them up again, if need be.
Jesper's touch is firm over Kaz's underwear and he traces the outline of Kaz's cock over the fabric, rubbing him with some glorious friction, too eager to get him hard to take it slow. He pulls out of the kiss to breathe and because he is such a talker, nuzzling Kaz's nose with his. "I want to make you come, please, Kaz, let me give this to you." He breathes unsteadily, just as turned on, stroking him through his clothes. "You're so beautiful, it's all I've ever wanted."
[ Knowing this moment would happen and accepting it is not the same thing. It had been a year for him, longer for them both. He hadn't thought about this ever happening.
And now all he can think about is when it happens again. ]
We should and are. No sense not following up on things.
How often has this happened, Jesper? That you've known and how many came back?
I was thinking of asking Altair to go out with us, he's very sneaky and always on roofs, he may have the kind of skills we're looking for.
[ Not a replacement, but Inej would want someone like her to go with them, in case they needed a Wraith-like partner. ]
At least one or two a month, probably, I don't know everyone who has come and gone, so that's an estimate. A few people have gone and come back, usually with memories, but one who came back with no memory of this place at all.
Kaz, she's happier in our world. She's with her parents and she still has us. If anyone has a good option to go back to, it's Inej.
while on the road
Still alive.
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I didn't know ghosts could do this.
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I will exorcise you but I'll be sorry.
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Why?
Nevermind, I can guess why you're asking.
If I said something wrong, he could have told me rather than turning to you.
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It’s only a question, Kaz. No need to assume the worst.
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It's a question borne of him coming to you about it. That makes it something.
[ So of course he assumes the worst. ]
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Post Claude conversation
So it should be a big warning sign when he shows up at Kaz's door knocking sharply, something big enough to concern him more than his own bad feelings. Jesper doesn't look sick but he looks anxious, pale and jittery, nothing supernatural about it but plain old panic. Usually Jesper is the most fearless of the bunch, throwing himself into trouble with a laugh and reckless shrug. There are only a few things that truly scare him, and one of them just got severely slammed on. The fear of the army knowing his Grisha abilities, like at home.
"It's possible there is a problem," he says to Kaz when the door opens instead of a greeting. Jesper bites his lip, making eye contact and then glancing away, his feelings a bit of a mess at the moment. Trust him to keep bringing problems to the man he loves instead of solving them.
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Kaz opens the door at the rap cautiously, still dressed in all but his overcoat and even with his gloves still on. Blinking as he steps back to let Jesper in, wondering if he's finally broken the silence that they've both kept. He doesn't expect an apology, nor does he have anything to apologize for, and yet they're both waiting on it. There's so much more, the flirting, the push that he could hurt Kaz and it's only left him wanting to prove he can't be hurt, this place can't hurt him and it can't use Inej and Jesper to do it. He's taken a million steps forwards in a short time.
And now he's gone back beyond the starting line of when he'd arrived. At least its how it feels to him.
Those words though are something else entirely.
"Sit down," he says softly, that part of him that had come so far wanting to be there for him, to comfort him when it's obvious he's in a panic. Yet he fears his reaction if he tries, fears he'll make Jesper feel he's disgusted with him and so he does what he knows he can. To help in the ways he still can. "And then tell me everything."
No argument. No question. Just there for him. Even as he stays by the door, watching Jesper as if he can't look away.
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He brushes past him and sits on the bed, putting his elbows on his knees and his chin on top of his hands. Jesper is all long limbs and while wearing bright colors like red usually is a display of his personality, right then it seemed like the vividness of the color of his jacket was washing him out instead.
"On the supply run, we came across a ravine, we had a limited amount of time to get over it in order to make it into Solvunn. There was a creature of some kind below, so it was important we got across."
Jesper didn't go into exact detail about the supply run, brushing it off as a success and that he used his corecloth and new metal armor for the first time. He did mention that his metal armor, which he turned into a dozen blades immediately, sliced through some animal attack and he thought he was very impressive. Ciri even thought he was impressive! Because Jesper likes to show off. Kaz knows how impressive he is in a fight, so there's no reason to try and show off for him, but he is naturally that way. He can always be more badass in the eyes of everyone else. But this part he didn't mention since it'd seemed handled.
"Claude distracted the guards so that Ciri and I could use our abilities. She can teleport, not sure why she wants it secret, but she does." And now Kaz will have to keep that secret. Teleporting seems like a fairly harmless ability but who is he to assume what is or isn't scary for other people? "We got down some trees and I used my abilities to create a bridge of bark. It was bloody hard, I passed out afterward. The guards didn't see any of it happen."
Because of Claude. Jesper should be showing off just as much about this, it was a huge display of his Grisha abilities, and difficult and complex, turning the trees into a bridge, molding them with the rock of the ground. Strong enough for people and horses and a caravan full of things to get through. It was necessary, but now Jesper sees how dangerous it was. Except what was he supposed to do? It was the only option. They had to succeed, Free Cities needed those supplies after the attack.
"Claude told me he was taken in for questioning by guards, and they asked him about how we got over the ravine. He lied successfully, but he thinks they're going to ask the rest of us."
And that could put Jesper into a trap.
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Yet it's rolling off of him in waves, radiating nervousness and uncertainty. Things he's always done well to keep underwraps but unaware he can't hide like he used to. Not after what he's been through recently.
He's quiet though, standing and watching Jesper intently to take in not just his words but what lies beneath them. The fear of being found out to carry his own magic here, what that could mean, and what comes next. He can imagine how all of that is weighing on Jesper's mind.
And despite his own issues, his uncertainty with where they stand, his own emotions well up. Jesper is his, and he'll be damned if someone here tries to take him away.
For one he takes from it that Jesper is much more advanced than he'd like to admit. A Grisha with those abilities would be a welcome addition to the Second Army, and he suspects the Army here as well.
"Did he tell you the lies he told them? Enough so you could give your own version of how you managed it based on his story?" He's quiet a moment, considering this as he not knowing enough about all of this to know what they would do from here, but he knows why Jesper fears.
"Are they conscripting Grisha here as they do for the Second Army?"
He has another fear as well. That would use him against the magicians in other lands, someone that strong would be valuable, but so far they had asked and not forced. Yet.
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maybe can start wrapping on this one!
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{You could be my oasis » Kaz's room @ The Inn
She doesn't say a word or make a noise when the soft noises of something being unlocked makes her eyes jump toward the door. A smile spreads over her lips even before he has a chance to notice or greet her. She doesn't even have to actively hear him say the words anymore, she knows they're coming and it makes something in her giddy. Stupid boy.
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Now as he opens the door, he's acutely aware of a sensation that is both familiar and pleasantly jarring at the same time.
He knows that many thought him as mystical as his Spider, both seeming to possess gifts that are far beyond the scope of the average person. It never occurred to them that it came from danger and threats and the need to always be one step ahead of everyone else if they wanted to survive.
Standing there, barely across the threshold, he's aware of a change of light in the room where her form changes the shadows. He knows the scent of her, the very energy she possesses. A singular step to the side, the tap of his cane as he moves and then the door clicks shut, followed by the solid sound of the lock engaged.
Any who say him might not think his expression warm but Inej may know differently at the slightest twitch of his lips, and the definite emotion in those words.
"Hello, Wraith."
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It's comforting.
She missed this.
"Swindle any crooks for fun today?" she lets that smile turn more sly into a smirk.
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A golden bangle. A small fold of money in a clip. A singular cufflink.
"I regret not getting the pair," he laments as if he's truly bothered. "Not how I would like to be handling business but it pays for what we need."
It might be resorting back to his roots but that's why he had forever kept nimble in such things.
"And you? What have you done to keep busy?"
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i just found this buried in my inbox 😭
Backtagging is never a worry
💖
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continued
Jesper ends up not being afraid that Kaz will pass out after all. He can catch him if so, but there is a difference between being light-headed from trauma and light-headed from desire. Kaz is about to learn that very well, considering whose arms he's in and the promises he's made. The kiss remains sweet although there is applied pressure, but he doesn't part his lips and taste him. Jesper knows it is best to dance that line.
He turns his head when Kaz's skin touches his cheek, breathless, to brush his lips against the fingertips and the palm of the glove. Jesper looks at him with eyes that are pure silver when in this setting, and he smiles, leaning in. This time not to kiss him but to speak right against his ear. He leans Kaz back against the wall again and slides his arm from around him.
"Have you ever touched yourself, Kaz?" His voice is pure deep honey near his ear, his breath blowing on it but he isn't kissing it. He is the one being good about skin touch, making certain that every time they connect with skin it is Kaz's choice. It's not as if Jesper needs to touch his ear for his words to be felt. Jesper puts a hand on his heart and slowly presses it down.
Down, down, down.
Kaz can stop it at any point if he wants to, it is clear that Jesper is testing their boundaries, but he did tell Kaz he had an idea. If allowed, he places his hand on top of Kaz's pants, exactly where he would put his mouth if he could. He doesn't apply pressure yet but his hand is scorching hot, it would be so simply.
"I can get you off just like this, Kaz. You'd never have to touch skin." He did tell him he could make it so good. Jesper pauses though, he doesn't touch him more than that. "We could have a good time over our clothes. We could touch ourselves and watch the other while we do. I could tell you what I want to do to you as you touch yourself. There are many ways of being sexual, and I want to help you explore that, when you're ready."
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And now it was time for him to give them everything he could.
That touch of lips against his finger tips makes him shiver, lips parted and his cheeks red as he stares at Jesper with such dark eyes that they're practically pools of onyx.
That question causes an instant reaction, one that is nearly painful in that moment between shock at the kiss and words that challenged him to make an admission. One that was more complicated than he wanted to get into in this moment.
And easy enough not to answer as Jesper's skilled hand skims down along his body and he feels as if he's positively thrumming. There's no move to stop the other man, not even able to stop himself from leaning into Jesper's touch with a soft sound that is equally pained and desperate in turns.
The truth is that Kaz has held vague thoughts of things like this, of things he could do with those he cares about despite all his fears and panic but he'd always dismissed this. So certain it would be dismissed, that it wouldn't be enough for them, and now Jesper is offering him so much.
And this is his chance to say no, to explain he can't handle it, doesn't want this, and all would be a lie.
Instead though he draws back slightly, only enough to look Jesper in the eyes as he drags his fingers along the other man's cheek. Then his fingertips brush against Jesper's throat, pressing to the pulse of his throat for a moment.
Trembling as he leans in, kissing him once more as his lips part and his tongue brushes lightly against the breadth of Jesper's bottom lip.
"Show me."
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His own blood is boiling from the intimacy of the moment, from seeing Kaz surrender to him and what he's doing. Jesper wasn't entirely certain if this would be too much but Kaz is demanding (begging?) for more. He lets out a sharp breath when Kaz's tongue touches his lip and he almost loses control of himself. Almost kisses him within an inch of his life, plundering his mouth with his tongue, he wants it so much, but it seems like a risk, going too intense.
Because of that he reins himself in to return the kiss, pressing close, and he parts his lips so that Kaz can choose to explore if he wants it. Jesper is still dedicating himself to letting Kaz pick any skin contact while he is taking advantage of the clothes. Jesper's hands drop to Kaz's pants and he undoes them just a little to make it easier for him to only have one layer of clothes between them. It would be very easy to hurriedly do them up again, if need be.
Jesper's touch is firm over Kaz's underwear and he traces the outline of Kaz's cock over the fabric, rubbing him with some glorious friction, too eager to get him hard to take it slow. He pulls out of the kiss to breathe and because he is such a talker, nuzzling Kaz's nose with his. "I want to make you come, please, Kaz, let me give this to you." He breathes unsteadily, just as turned on, stroking him through his clothes. "You're so beautiful, it's all I've ever wanted."
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Can wrap here or on yours. ThEY ARE SO CUTE.
after Inej, and they've had to 'accept' it
[ Keeping because she may come back is the implication. ]
I think we should still follow up the lead for Latimer.
Kaz Brekker has to accept nothing >.>
And now all he can think about is when it happens again. ]
We should and are. No sense not following up on things.
How often has this happened, Jesper? That you've known and how many came back?
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[ Not a replacement, but Inej would want someone like her to go with them, in case they needed a Wraith-like partner. ]
At least one or two a month, probably, I don't know everyone who has come and gone, so that's an estimate. A few people have gone and come back, usually with memories, but one who came back with no memory of this place at all.
Kaz, she's happier in our world. She's with her parents and she still has us. If anyone has a good option to go back to, it's Inej.
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after being arrested
It was fantastic.
But we got caught so I'm going to the mining camp for a few weeks.
Worth it, honestly.
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Do you know the part that bothers me the most? You got caught.
Did I not teach you better? I failed you that badly? At least tell me Wylan would be proud.
[ Is some of that teasing? Maybe just a tiny bit. Even if he kind of feels he did. The man got caught after all! ]
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Wylan would be very proud, I used all his knowledge. No one was killed too, so he'd be grateful for that.
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